Crown Hotel, Surry Hills

Cnr Crown & Cleveland Streets, Surry Hills
Reviewers present: Miller and Blogs
Time of review: pre-gig drink

"Two different pubs in the one pub"

We were on our way to a Regurgitator gig at the HiFi Bar and we ask local Sydney Pub List reviewer, Southy, what the worst pub along Cleveland is to stop at. He suggests the Crown Hotel and we soon find out why.

We grabbed a spot at the front bar, ordered up a couple of beers (Carlton Draught $5.20) and checked out the food on offer for our pre-gig dinner. After a brief of the menu, we decided to pass, drink the beer and head on out. Miller thought it was a Tuesday when we walked in due to the dance music they were pumping through the sound system. 'Eccy Tuesday'?

Bit of a weird mix in here. Literally two different types of pubs in the one place. Some kind of tear in the space-time continuum that has blended these two places together. On one side of the bar we find a more modern-looking area with high tables, a couch and projector screen occupied by a mob of hip-dressed eastern suburbs folk. Heading around to the other side we pass a ratty booth area and further around, a betting corner where the older locals are perched with eyes stuck on the horse races. You may as well draw a line at the bar. The two worlds don't mix. Miller notes that the last time he was there, about 2005 or so, some renovations were just complete and they had all the old local pissheads in this swanky renovated bar. "Catering to your best clientele and marketing to the hip crowd goes wrong."

While noting the liquids on tap (Pure Blonde, Resches Draght, Monteiths Apple Cider, Bulmers Original and Pear, VB, Tiger, Coopers Pale, and Fat Yak - not a bad range), Mr Miller spots Bundy Draught on tap. Don't see that very often. While I'm not too fussed myself, he sure is. He was keen to try a Bundy Draught, first in 7 years, but unfortunately they were out. Touring the venue with our drinks, we check out the pokie room, which scarily appears to be bigger then the front bar. The toilets got a look in too and I have to say they were pretty filthy.

Upstairs you'll find "Dome". Swank. Appropriate name, "Dome" - a dome of douches. The first contact we have with staff is, "Are you here for a function?", as if to say we didn't fit in with their mould or  ideal customer. We exit quickly. Back downstairs at the bar we notice an older lady waiting to be served with a $20 note in hand, which we then spot her sniffing up to her nose. Twice. Hilarious. Saw another lady, who was leaning up at the bar just beside us, with un-assisted pancakes hanging down out the sides of her Rolling Stones singlet. Eyes burning! Back to the money-sniffer, we then spot her on the cool-kids side of the bar handing over her pre-sniffed note. Just when she thinks no one is looking, she disturbingly puts a finger in her mouth and sucks it like she's sucking the yummy money from her digits. Gross.

So, wrapping up -
Shit music downstairs.  Negative points.
Pokie room bigger than the front bar. Negative points
Cheap meals. Cheap meals, maybe cheap quality? Benefit-of-the-doubt-points.
An okay range of beers at okay prices. Points.
The mens, negative points.
The weird money-sniffing lady - PRICELESS!
1.5 Schooners and no Bundy Draught